Love At Work
Love At Work
Love At Work
Love At Work
Most of us don’t place a high enough value on relationships at work. Yet, there has never been a more important or strategic time to turn from the temporary aspects of our work and make time to care for people.
I have made a lot of mistakes in leading teams and organizations, but the largest mistakes I have made were caused by not valuing the relationships with my coworkers as highly as I should have. Making mistakes in business is always an opportunity for growth, yet our relational mistakes frequently cause collateral damage that can last a lifetime.
Most of us don’t place a high enough value on relationships at work. Yet, there has never been a more important or strategic time to turn from the temporary aspects of our work and make time to care for people. Now is the time to love others at work.
People Over Profit
Employee turnover is one of the most costly things in business. Taking care of people over profit is good business. Richard Branson, the world-renowned entrepreneur and founder of the Virgin Group says it this way, “Clients do not come first. Employees come first. If you take care of your employees, they will take care of the clients.” After decades of experience and corporate research the results are clear: Taking care of employees motivates and empowers them to take care of the organization’s customers and shareholders. “If you wonder what getting and keeping the right employees has to do with getting and keeping the right customers, the answer is everything. Employees who are not loyal are unlikely to build an inventory of customers who are.” Frederick F Reichheld, The Loyalty Effect.
Yet, far too often leaders see people (employees, coworkers, bosses and customers) as a means to their personal goals. Manipulating others to achieve a goal is always bad business — even when it appears to be a good strategic move.
In order for companies to thrive in this challenging environment — a period that is being labeled as “The Great Resignation” — companies must place relationships with their employees over short-term profits. According to recent research from McKinsey & Company, “Forty percent of employees stated that they are at least somewhat likely to leave their current job in the next three to six months. Organizations that take the time to learn why—and act thoughtfully—will have an edge in attracting and retaining talent.”
In order to lead organizations into the future, leaders will need to value people over profit, relationships over tasks, and coworkers over customers.
Love Over Knowledge
To properly value people we must see them for who they are. All people are made in the image of God and all people are made for a relationship with God and neighbor (Genesis 1:26-27). When we know that we are made in the image of God we look to Jesus to define love for us.
Jesus explains that we are to love our neighbors (including coworkers and customers) as we love ourselves (Luke 10:27). Love is putting the needs of others above your own. Jesus did exactly that for us and He commands us to do the same.
“A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.” - John 13:34-35
Sacrificing things that we value for others makes them feel cared for. Giving our coworkers our time, attention, and the other resources available to us, will let them know they are loved. The love of Jesus is available to us in an incomprehensible and inexhaustible supply. When we know we are loved by Jesus, we have plenty of love to share with others. The apostle Paul prays for those who follow Jesus to know and understand the love of Christ this way:
“…I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord's holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge —that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.” - Ephesians 3:17-19
3 C’s Of Love At Work
Understanding that loving people at work is good business and a command of God does not make it easy. Here are three ways to treat others just as you would yourself.
Care For Them — To properly care for others we must have empathy and compassion for them. In order to have empathy and compassion we need to know them. We should be constantly curious about the people we work with. Thoughtful questions are the key to constant curiosity. We should take time to start one-one-one meetings with questions about how the other person is doing. A co-worker’s answer to the question, “how are you doing?” informs the rest of the meeting. If they are going through a tough time at home our expectations will likely be different. If we find out they are not feeling challenged at work, a leader can steer the conversation in a direction that gives them more responsibility. This approach not only works with direct reports but works well with peers and bosses. Knowing how someone is doing always changes the rest of the conversation.
Connect Them To Value — made in the image of God (1:27), your coworkers want to provide value. Most people value making a meaningful contribution to an organization far above the traditional benefits of their job. Recent research from McKinsey and company supports this. “The top three factors employees cited as reasons for quitting were that they didn’t feel valued by their organizations (54 percent) or their managers (52 percent) or because they didn’t feel a sense of belonging at work (51 percent).” This research completely clarifies what is most important for anyone leading people. The job of a leader is to connect the gifts of each person to the needs and purposes of the organization.
Correct What Is Wrong — even if we ask all the right questions to coworkers and connect them in ways that allow them to contribute to the organization in meaningful ways — we will still make many mistakes in our relationships at work. Loving others means correcting relationship mistakes. Jesus gives us an amazing command regarding broken relationships.
“Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your gift.” - Matthew 5:23-24
Note how Jesus cares more about relationships than even offering our gifts in worship. To mend relationships we need to do the following:
- Apologize for our mistakes without excuses (Romans 14:19).
- Understand the harm we caused them and recognize the cost to them. Seek to repay them to make up for their loss (Philemon 1:17-18).
- Forgive them completely for any harm they caused us (Matthew 18:21-22).
Our efforts to reconcile with others will not always be successful. Our responsibility is to be sincere (Romans 12:9) and to seek peace with others as far as it depends on us (Romans 12:18).
There are many other types of challenges we face with relationships at work, like an employee who is in the wrong job, or a teammate with a poor attitude toward work, or even a boss that does not properly support you. But, we can be confident that if we start by striving to love our coworkers as ourselves — the answers to these challenges will become clear.
Resources:
McKinsey Quarterly - ‘Great Attrition’ or ‘Great Attraction’? The choice is yours
Getting Right with God and Each Other, sermon by John Piper
I have made a lot of mistakes in leading teams and organizations, but the largest mistakes I have made were caused by not valuing the relationships with my coworkers as highly as I should have. Making mistakes in business is always an opportunity for growth, yet our relational mistakes frequently cause collateral damage that can last a lifetime.
Most of us don’t place a high enough value on relationships at work. Yet, there has never been a more important or strategic time to turn from the temporary aspects of our work and make time to care for people. Now is the time to love others at work.
People Over Profit
Employee turnover is one of the most costly things in business. Taking care of people over profit is good business. Richard Branson, the world-renowned entrepreneur and founder of the Virgin Group says it this way, “Clients do not come first. Employees come first. If you take care of your employees, they will take care of the clients.” After decades of experience and corporate research the results are clear: Taking care of employees motivates and empowers them to take care of the organization’s customers and shareholders. “If you wonder what getting and keeping the right employees has to do with getting and keeping the right customers, the answer is everything. Employees who are not loyal are unlikely to build an inventory of customers who are.” Frederick F Reichheld, The Loyalty Effect.
Yet, far too often leaders see people (employees, coworkers, bosses and customers) as a means to their personal goals. Manipulating others to achieve a goal is always bad business — even when it appears to be a good strategic move.
In order for companies to thrive in this challenging environment — a period that is being labeled as “The Great Resignation” — companies must place relationships with their employees over short-term profits. According to recent research from McKinsey & Company, “Forty percent of employees stated that they are at least somewhat likely to leave their current job in the next three to six months. Organizations that take the time to learn why—and act thoughtfully—will have an edge in attracting and retaining talent.”
In order to lead organizations into the future, leaders will need to value people over profit, relationships over tasks, and coworkers over customers.
Love Over Knowledge
To properly value people we must see them for who they are. All people are made in the image of God and all people are made for a relationship with God and neighbor (Genesis 1:26-27). When we know that we are made in the image of God we look to Jesus to define love for us.
Jesus explains that we are to love our neighbors (including coworkers and customers) as we love ourselves (Luke 10:27). Love is putting the needs of others above your own. Jesus did exactly that for us and He commands us to do the same.
“A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.” - John 13:34-35
Sacrificing things that we value for others makes them feel cared for. Giving our coworkers our time, attention, and the other resources available to us, will let them know they are loved. The love of Jesus is available to us in an incomprehensible and inexhaustible supply. When we know we are loved by Jesus, we have plenty of love to share with others. The apostle Paul prays for those who follow Jesus to know and understand the love of Christ this way:
“…I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord's holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge —that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.” - Ephesians 3:17-19
3 C’s Of Love At Work
Understanding that loving people at work is good business and a command of God does not make it easy. Here are three ways to treat others just as you would yourself.
Care For Them — To properly care for others we must have empathy and compassion for them. In order to have empathy and compassion we need to know them. We should be constantly curious about the people we work with. Thoughtful questions are the key to constant curiosity. We should take time to start one-one-one meetings with questions about how the other person is doing. A co-worker’s answer to the question, “how are you doing?” informs the rest of the meeting. If they are going through a tough time at home our expectations will likely be different. If we find out they are not feeling challenged at work, a leader can steer the conversation in a direction that gives them more responsibility. This approach not only works with direct reports but works well with peers and bosses. Knowing how someone is doing always changes the rest of the conversation.
Connect Them To Value — made in the image of God (1:27), your coworkers want to provide value. Most people value making a meaningful contribution to an organization far above the traditional benefits of their job. Recent research from McKinsey and company supports this. “The top three factors employees cited as reasons for quitting were that they didn’t feel valued by their organizations (54 percent) or their managers (52 percent) or because they didn’t feel a sense of belonging at work (51 percent).” This research completely clarifies what is most important for anyone leading people. The job of a leader is to connect the gifts of each person to the needs and purposes of the organization.
Correct What Is Wrong — even if we ask all the right questions to coworkers and connect them in ways that allow them to contribute to the organization in meaningful ways — we will still make many mistakes in our relationships at work. Loving others means correcting relationship mistakes. Jesus gives us an amazing command regarding broken relationships.
“Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your gift.” - Matthew 5:23-24
Note how Jesus cares more about relationships than even offering our gifts in worship. To mend relationships we need to do the following:
- Apologize for our mistakes without excuses (Romans 14:19).
- Understand the harm we caused them and recognize the cost to them. Seek to repay them to make up for their loss (Philemon 1:17-18).
- Forgive them completely for any harm they caused us (Matthew 18:21-22).
Our efforts to reconcile with others will not always be successful. Our responsibility is to be sincere (Romans 12:9) and to seek peace with others as far as it depends on us (Romans 12:18).
There are many other types of challenges we face with relationships at work, like an employee who is in the wrong job, or a teammate with a poor attitude toward work, or even a boss that does not properly support you. But, we can be confident that if we start by striving to love our coworkers as ourselves — the answers to these challenges will become clear.
Resources:
McKinsey Quarterly - ‘Great Attrition’ or ‘Great Attraction’? The choice is yours
Getting Right with God and Each Other, sermon by John Piper